Wasted Moments

I opened my blog just now and realized that today it's been exactly four months since my last poem... Was I really so busy?? The time seems to have just flown at lightening speed, and I am now almost halfway through the year without even noticing that... Keeping the jitters of my mind apart, I thought I could do with a new poem tonight... After all, my exams have ended, and there is a two month long holiday before me with nothing much eventful in schedule... I don't expect many to  understand this one, I just expect me to do so...

Time has gone by, nothing new I say

But its passing is different for each man

I realize sitting on this seventeenth of May.

Experiences altered, and altercating between the mind and its state

Many times leave us wondering our past happenings

Allowing us to choose, the lie that all was fate.

They come flooding to my senses, taking my current away

Browsing the memory and its reasons in its own

Although my mind refuses my reluctance to remember today.

What I did I cannot change, these needless thoughts still persist

The past coming to haunt time and again all the time

However I may faint, trying hopelessly to resist.

The days were the same, the seconds were shared

For me and everyone around I know, but the surroundings

Were different, for those who failed, from those who dared.

Those things and their days I want to forget forever

And I fail to find out how I remember especially them in detail

But remember I do, still haunted day and night, lost now waiting for that never.

Am I sane? I ask myself again, as I realize again I have lost my moment

Losing my mind and body to the control of that something unexplained

Thinking about things only supposed to be of torment.

I answer myself, faltering and pausing, of course I say

I'm alright to me, at the same time know although I

That so many I's talking to me, in itself means I have never been okay.