A Glance

I saw my life yesterday,
She was walking on the road,
I don't know whether she looked at me, but surely looked away,
As if  I was an ugly toad,
I saw my life yesterday after long,
Still I am alive like I was living,
So why did she still give me butterflies?
She isn't the only reason I'm thriving,
But I doubt not, that she's one of them all the same,
Why I live, not only for her,
But she's among the things,
I would surely die for,
What I feel for her I don't know these days,
It has been so long,
I still love her like I used to do,
Or have I actually moved on?
I don't know, I wish I would,
At least some revelations this mysterious life should make,
Everything seems so clandestine these days,
So many dead leaves heaped on the truth left to rake,
A moment is too short to meet again,
And when the banks are asunder who needs a link?
Ignoramus when we are separated long ago,
There's no point now trying to straighten any old kink,
Past is past, it was never meant to be the future,
I should have known that long ago,
If verity had lifted its veil before,
I would not have suffered such a decrepiting blow,
Today she is happy, that's all I need,
And that's all I will ever need to be glad,
What of me, I am dispensable,
Lost in this lovely life, and forever mad.

Why Can't I?

Why can't I remember you anymore?
Like I used to do on those lonely sleepless nights,
Why can't I think of you anymore?
Like I used to when I had nothing left but lonely sighs,
Why can't I love you anymore?
Like I used to do with all my heart till a few days ago,
Why can't I dream of you every night anymore?
Like I used to do when you were all I had to know,
Why can't I feel your breath to be mine anymore?
Like I used to do when you ran merrily past all,
Why can't I feel your heartbeats to be the same as mine anymore?
Like I used to feel when my heart pumped so fast when I saw you in the fall,
Why can't I run to you anymore?
Like a lost puppy following your redolence,
Why can't I speak to you anymore,
Like I used to do so desperately those days,
Why can't I write for you anymore,
Like I used to every moment garnering my love for you,
.....

CAN ANYONE SUGGEST A SUITABLE ENDING OR CONTINUATION?? I am just stuck here.............

Story of A Fallen Angel

I am just sinking, gasping for air, wry, dry, drenched, lost, and immersed eternally, in the nectar of pure untainted darkness, so sweet, so serene, so beautiful, so soothing, so... So fatal... Take me out of this... I feel lonely here without you, and it feels even lonelier when you are around... Now, I can't see any road ahead, just scrounging for some path like some lost vagabond. Everything is blurry... Just darkness, the sound of my heart throbbing for air, dying, slowly, craving for each single atom of air to keep its feeble beats ignited for even a paucity of time. It isn't going to keep me alive for long.. For in this ocean of ignominious sorrow, my own wails are clenching my neck like vile gigantic pincers... The depraved dark water looks unto me, laughing in itself at my pitiable plight... Laughing on my loveless penury... But I am still trying to stay alive with my faltering breaths, so steadily diminishing in intensity, to think, to tell the world my last words before the boundaries between me and this ashened sea cease to exist...

I wanted to make you my life... You refused to even be a part of it... The distance between us now is too vast... Our minds are so far asunder, it can never, ever, ever, decrease now... And the person to blame for that, is none but only me... Me, the protagonist of my poignant tale, me, the felon, me, the lost lover, me, the ruler, me, the vanquished... Me, the fallen angel, waiting to be reborn... Waiting for my wings to regrow looking upwards to heaven, so that I can fly high to my zenith once more to you, to try this fallible life once again, and this hope, this shimmering hope, will keep my soul alive till I am resurrected... Till then, this fallen angel will lie here in a bed of ruins... Waiting... Waiting... And waiting...

And now I can't speak anymore, the lights of my existence are blinking out altogether... I can't go on... But I will... I will have to... I and am ready to die here now, to rise again one day, come back from the land of the dead, only to meet my goddess again, only to meet, YOU...

I'm Not Sorry

It maybe a crime to you, to fall for a beautiful damsel,
But to me, it's a bliss, not any matter of shame,
I didn't ask you to retaliate my love ever,
Just asked you to let me love you forever,
I won't apologize now for falling in your love so much,
Neither can you blame me for that as such,
For that's not what you can decide for me,
I met you in my life, and that was my destiny,
So I proudly proclaim today that I am not sorry for loving you at all,
Rather I am glad to have spent a few moments with you however small,
I thought once I had done a folly, and I am wrong,
But then I realized, how can one be wrong,
If love is the residence of everything,
From life to death and everything in between,
It can't be true, that you should not love,
If you think so for me, then what can I do?

I am not sorry, not at all,
I loved you in spring, still love you in this fall,
And I will always do,
No matter, if you don't, and maybe never will return my love for you. 

Vacations

I'm bored. Simply bored. To the core.
And this was not supposed to happen. I mean, when you hear that there's gonna be an autumn break of a week, you are supposed to get elated, the sleeping, playing, not much studies, and all that. But mid way through my holidays, here I am, writing a post about how bored I am. You can imagine now how desperately I have nothing else to do.
Actually, as I am Bengali, this is a festive season for me. When other Indians follow Navratra and fast, we celebrate our Durga Puja & feast! Again, unity in varied diversity of India, renewed. But all that pushed apart, except roaming about here and there, sometimes with friends, sometimes with parents, I have nothing to do. I think holidays should be abolished. And if they aren't, at least some homework should be given, even in college. After all, who wants to write or study all by himself on his own? Not me. I don't know care about others.
Strictly speaking, these vacations began on an ugly note, or rather say, the last working day of school, oops, I mean college (I forget that I have grown up a bit) ended on an ugly note. Then from the next day, nothing to do, either blogging, or facebooking, or watching the idiot box, or reading, or playing my guitar, but still, those things do come under the nothing to do category to me, because those things hardly need any effort after gaining proficiency.
I think I should take up a new hobby, would be glad if somebody could suggest any. So confused. I could do with something creative or motivational. Till then, eagerly waiting for the regular routine to begin. I miss my friends, a lot. And there's a limit to how friendly you can be with your parents, stuck in your home all day.
These things happen every time with me, but there's a good news. I am not too well, so can spend half the day sleeping. My persistent recurring infection occurred again, so I am weak these days, don't feel like jumping around that much. An excuse to not think idly, you may say.
So much so, typed a little and I am feeling tired. Think I should get some sleep. Let's see what the remaining days are like. Waiting to experience something eventful, maybe on my cards. Who knows? :-)

Funny Notice

I don't know what the hell is going to happen to my country... Read this beside a construction site... The bridge is being built for years now but this was put up quite recently...

A Short Thought

Lonely evenings,
Misty skies,
Lovely life,
But full of lies...

I wrote this a while ago when I was chatting with someone. It just came up in my mind by itself. It was when she asked me the meaning that I realized how deep it went.

"Lovely evenings," means that after the whole day, however the day goes, we feel tried, and feel contented to return home and rest. So regardless of the whether the day was good or bad, we are glad to escape to our own comfort zone of our home. As they say, home sweet home.

"Misty skies," well that's a tricky one. First I thought that meant tears, but one shouldn't always be so negative. I found an optimistic explanation after pondering for a while. It means that the sky is hazed, beautiful, and new life is coming. Maybe it will rain too, to give birth to new life from the seeds buried inside the earth.

"Lovely life," needs no thought. We all love our life. Yeah, some surely refuse to accept that, but in the end, all of us are glad that we are human beings, regardless of what we may say to others. We can't lie to ourselves, you know. So, as I always say, Live Life, the Lovely Way.

"But full of lies," that too is an undeniable truth. Verity can't be escaped, and same goes with life. Lies, betrayals, are a part of life. You just have to cope with it. And when you think you can't go on, read the lines above, and try to be cheerful, for life is short, but long enough to do something for yourself and be happy.